I Dussent Likes De Winter Mumfs!

I dussent likes de winter mumfs 

Cos dey is frozey cold!

I dussent likes to leave my bed,

But always I am told;

It's "get up Bert" and "go outside"

And lots of uvver nags,

But den ders times I can't decide,

Cos my tail dus little wags!

I dussent likes de bitey frost 

It stings my little paws!

But she dus fink dat she's de boss

So she dus make de laws!

But wot she can't get in her head

Wen she dus early rise,

Is I dus wants to stay in bed,

Cos mornings I despise!

I dussent likes de soggy rain

Tickling my eyes and snout!

I've told her dis again and again

But still she dus say, "OUT!"

Reluctantly I dus obey,

A command I can't avoid,

But sumtimes I wants to go away

And lives wiv dat Sian Lloyd.

(Sian Lloyd wuddent make me go out in de norty wevver. She wud make de wevver nice and warm and sunny for all de Border Terriers)