Tuesday 23 December 2014

Pet Video Verify – Pet Microchip Alternative (Guest post)

Pet Video Verify – Pet Microchip Alternative
Pet Video Verify’s software is video identification for your pet!
Today lost and found pets are a big issue. Many pet owners have high anxiety that their pet is going to get lost. They should be worried, the statistics are that many pets do get lost, it is estimated that 1 in 3 pets will get lost sometime time in their lifetime. If you don’t act quickly and have systems in place, you may never see the pet again. Pet Video Verify is developing applications that help you put systems in place that help manage your pets better with this website.

Pet Video Verify pet video identification system is a patent pending system. This video identification system is trying to revolutionize how lost pets are found and returned to the owner. In the current version of the web application, the pet owner looks over the pet for special attributes and takes measurements, then they video the pet including the special attributes and measurements, you can see an example of a video identification by clicking here. When all these special attributes and measurements are put together, virtually any pet can be identified. A video of your pet is a lot better way to identify them because with a video you can get all parts of the pets body. In the future, we are going to include electronic measurements of the pet in the video!

Pet Video Verify has integrated another application into its software and it is the ability to store pet medical records online by visiting here. When you have access to your pet medical records online, you can access the medical records anytime you need them from any device that is connected to the Internet. Keeping your pet medical records online also help veterinarians because if your pet gets lost and ends up at the vet, the vet may not know the identity of your pet. The vet can use the video identification to identify your pet and also pull your pet's medical records! Very helpful and can save your pet's life!

Pet Video Verify has an application where pet owners can sell their used pet items to other pet owners. Pet owners search the Internet looking for pet items. Many would prefer pet items that have already been used and that the owner needs to get rid of, which can be found here. They can search Pet Video Verify for these items and contact the owner to purchase those items.

Pet Video Verify also receives pet coupons from major retailers at their site. We receive the coupons or deals from big retailers such as PetSmart! We push the coupons and deals directly to our users helping them find deals on new items that they need for their pet! We are getting new advertisers all the time so we receive lots of good coupons and deals!

Pet Video Verify also has a pet supply store for when you want new pet items instead of used ones!  We are updating these new pet items all the time.  Check out these items by clicking here!
You can also post your cute pet pictures for everyone to see on our website. People love cute pet pictures because they bring joy to their life. Pet owners love posting them because they are proud of their pet and they want them to bring joy to other people.  Also, look at funny pet videos by clicking here!

Sunday 21 December 2014

Silly Hoomans Invented Silly Time!

Watches and calendars, diaries and clocks,
Hoomans made time and now it won't stop!
But all de time dey forever complain
And grumble and moan over again!

Shuddent have invented time den!

Dey say dey will just be a minit or two,
Wen dey dus go outs and be leaving you!
But wot dey don't know and dus not accept,
However long dey go is long to be left!

Dey shuddent do dat!

We is not stoopid and we is not fick,
Cos we won't be rooled by clocks dat tick!
Hoomans you must learn and learn it well,
Life can't be valued by wot de time dus tell.

For you an hour is not very long,
But hoomans you is so very rong!
And we can't conceive how you can measure
Dis life you believe to be such a treasure!

Compared to yours our lives is short,
But dat is just a hooman fort.
We finks you silly watching de clocks,
Being controlled by tickity tocks!

Pfft. Tickity tocks is stoopid!

Chewing a bone or going for a run,
Dats wot makes our lives such fun.
Having a play den having a snooze,
Wiv no time in our day, we've no time to lose!

So don't compare our lives to yours,
Ders hands on clocks but der issent paws!
And always remember your time won't forgive,
So do wot we do, we dus just live!

And we fink its better dat way! 

Friday 19 December 2014

I Dussent Likes De Winter Mumfs!

I dussent likes de winter mumfs 
Cos dey is frozey cold!
I dussent likes to leave my bed,
But always I am told;
It's "get up Bert" and "go outside"
And lots of uvver nags,
But den ders times I can't decide,
Cos my tail dus little wags!

I dussent likes de bitey frost 
It stings my little paws!
But she dus fink dat she's de boss
So she dus make de laws!
But wot she can't get in her head
Wen she dus early rise,
Is I dus wants to stay in bed,
Cos mornings I despise!

I dussent likes de soggy rain
Tickling my eyes and snout!
I've told her dis again and again
But still she dus say, "OUT!"
Reluctantly I dus obey,
A command I can't avoid,
But sumtimes I wants to go away
And lives wiv dat Sian Lloyd.

(Sian Lloyd wuddent make me go out in de norty wevver. She wud make de wevver nice and warm and sunny for all de Border Terriers) 






Tuesday 16 December 2014

Wen A Furpal Is Poorly And Sick

Wen a furpal is poorly and sick
Wiv wounds we cannot lick,
Hushed howls fill de air
And we is all der,
Wishing for a get well qwik!

In our hearts ders nuffin but lite,
And our tails swish left to rite,
To St. Francis we pray,
And dis we dus say;
Please make our furpal alright!

Wen a furpal is hurting in pain,
Paws togever we prays again.
Our healing touch
May not be much,
But furpals dus never complain.

In our hearts ders nuffin but care,
And we dussent understand despair,
Coz de way we dus cope
Is wiv trust and hope
Dat St Francis will always be der!

(Be strong little Bella) xxx

Sunday 30 November 2014

I Dus Loves My Chow Chows

I dus loves my Chow Chows
But manners dey haves few,
For wen you calls their names
Dey will turn away from you!

Dats rood Chow Chows!

I dus loves my Chow Chows
But I have to tell de troof,
If dey is being moody, 
Dey dus be aloof!

Dats also rood Chow Chows!

I dus loves my Chow Chows
But sumtimes wen we play,
Harf way through a citing game
Dey dus walks away!

I dus loves my Chow Chows
Deys never in a rush,
But if I'm in their way,
Dey dus shove and push!

Chow Chows never say 'excuse me'.

I dus loves my Chow Chows
Dey dus makes gud frends,
But wen dey dus be rood,
It drives me rownd de bends!

It dus!

I dus loves my Chow Chows,
Speshully wen we shares,
And wen we dus do cuddles,
It's like nuggling teddy bears.

I dus loves my Chow Chows!


I Want To Believe That I Will Live On

I want to believe that I will live on
Beyond the years ov my life,
But a wise old Chow Chow did telled me once,
That it's I who will cause her strife.
It is I who will cross the Rainbow Bridge
And enter the Happy Hunting Grownd,
And I will not live beyond her years,
One day, it is I who will not be around.

Sumtimes I look rite into her face
And into her haunted eyes,
And I see all the time and all the space
That's echoing her heartbroken cries,
And I dare not tell her wot I know,
For fear ov braking her heart,
But first it's I that's the one to go,
And I know that will tear her apart.

So I pray to St. Francis she's not aware
Ov the wisdom that I dus hold,
Don't let her know that I won't be there
Wen her time dus makes her old.
It is a fact we age before time,
But the time is wot hoomans made,
I forever will be in my prime,
I have nuffing to fear or evade!

So wen that time dus comes around,
St. Francis, please hold her paw,
Wen I'm settled in the Happy Hunting Grownd,
Let her know the 'Four Paw Lore':
The greatest love is love that goes on,
Not measured by time or space,
You must find more paws to love wen I'm gone,
Make me honoured to have given up my place! 


(This is ritten in remembrance ov a bootiful and wise very old Chow Chow called Mabel wot I loved and she told me lots ov fings and I dus miss her and her hoomans miss her and her sister Milly wot did go over the Rainbow Bridge before her. Chow Chows is very wise and dus learn you lots).

Saturday 29 November 2014

Quick Little Terrier!

Quick little terrier
Crunch up de mat
Nuzzle open de curtains 
And sort out dat.
Scatter your toys
Here and there,
Splatter bits ov your bone
Just everywhere,
And run little terrier 
Circle de room,
Race tracks de carpet 
ZOOM ZOOM ZOOM!
Zoomies norf, zoomies west,
Sowf and eest,
Zoomies is de best!

Quickly little terrier 
Crunkle up de bed,
Chews up de paper
Deys not yet red,
And gallop little terrier, 
Tuck up your tail,
Back paws to your chin
Go catch de mail,
Den drink little terrier 
And dig up your bowl,
Wen de worter has gone
Just dig a hole!

Contents ov handbags 
Dey shud be shared
So enforce dis little terrier 
Don't be scared!
But you must do all dis
Wen de key is in de door,
Den you can pretend 
Dey is not all dat you dus lives for!
Don't let dem finks
Or gets in der head
Wen dey left for work dis morning 
Dat you just sulked in your bed!


Wednesday 26 November 2014

We Is Not Presents

We is not presents
We is not gifts
We is not a token
To gives your life lifts!

We is not commodities
We is not toys
We is not your playthings 
To gives you your joys!

We is little souls
We haves clever brains
We dus knows happiness 
And we dus feels pains!

We haves beating hearts
We haves hopes and fears
And tho you may not notice 
We too dus cries our tears!

We is not presents 
We is not a festive treat
We are friends forever
From de moment we first meet!


Saturday 15 November 2014

The Border Terrier

Wot ever your people try to say
De hierarchy is so yesterday,
And dey need to learn
Dat the cleverest mind
Is dat of de terrier,
Particularly de Border kind!
We dus have de fafe 
Of a fafeful hound
But don't expect de terrier
To sleeps on de ground.
Wherever you choose to rest your head,
Dats where de terrier will makes its bed!

Wot ever your people try to declare
De hierarchy will never be der
And dey need to learn
And dey need to learn fast
Dat de terrier persistence 
Is bilt to last.
We dus have de loyalty 
Of a loyal hound
But don't expect de terrier
To hang around.
Wherever you choose to take a stroll
De terrier will find sum dirt to roll.

Wot ever your people try to announce
Dat daft hierarchy dussent weigh an ounce!
And dey need to learn
And dey needs to understand
Dat de terrier tenacity
Is stronger dan mans!
We dus have de love
Of a loving hound
But ders sumfings in de terrier
Dat is very profound;
Love and affection, wotever you need,
Care and protection, we is de perfect breed! 


Dear Saint Francis

Dear Saint Francis,

Wen you hear our little prayers
Dat we quietly howl to you up der
Cud you please have a gentle word
Wiv de uvver saints who haven't heard?
Cos hoomans have so many folk
Dat dey can pray to and evoke,
But we dus only haves one you
And even for a saint yous a lot to do.
Yet we dussent ever pray for very much,
A walk each day and a hooman touch,
Sum dinner and maybe a little bone,
And a place to sleep dat we can call home.

We ask dat furs and non furs alike,
Is given equality, dignity and rights.
But failing dat we simply plead,
For a little intercession for all furs in need.
So please Saint Francis if you don't mind,
We knows dat you is very kind,
Help dem hoomans do wots rite,
Dis we pray for every night. 

Amen


Wen You Dus Goes On Your Walks

Wen you dus goes on your walks
You hopes dey never ends,
And wen de hoomans stop to talks,
Dats wen you makes your frends.
You must remember not to wuff
And not to yip or yap,
Remember dat we is not ruff,
In fact wees far from dat!

So wen de hoomans be a bore,
We must pals up and team,
Ders sqizzels to be looking for
And wabbitz to be seen!
Ders niffs and lots of niffs around
And niffs dat can be shared,
Ders lovely niffs all over de ground,
Ders niffs just everywhere!

Dem hoomans always stand and chat,
And mostly dey tork rot,
But never mind about all dat,
Deys just a funny lot!
Wiv your frends you've got to play
And niffs and wags and run,
Cos den dey'll come anuvver day,
Wen you'll meets again for fun! 


Tuesday 11 November 2014

If We Cud Do Sum Speriments

If we cud do sum speriments
On all de human beings,
Our hypofesis wud be difficult 
Based on wot we been seings.

So we'd quietly offer a paw
And look into your eyes,
Please don't do dis anymore
Coz it really isn't nice!

And you knows enuff by now;
Dat all life dus feel pain,
You knows why and how,
Yet still you don't refrain!

If we cud do sum tests
On all de hooman race,
We'd just do our best
To makes de world a happy place!

Sum fur pals is on de brink
Of never being no more,
And we just ask dat you fink
Who and wot dis world is for!

 

Saturday 8 November 2014

Humans When You Lay Your Wreaths

Humans when you lay your wreaths,
Remember four legged friends,
Cos we does also feels griefs,
And wish that wars would end!
And in the trenches where men fell,
Animals too did fight,
They also suffered horrid hell,
Each and every night!

We does not have the chance to say,
When you does lay your wreaths,
But we remember them today,
And how death was their relief!
Those four legged friends did bravely charge,
Yet they never made that choice.
Their loyalty then will be as ours,
And we will be their voice!

Humans when you play last post,
Please play it once again,
So withs respect we can play host,
For paws and hoofs in pain.
When yous all now laying wreaths,
Hear howling in the air,
We cries and barks in our griefs,
Fur pals that is not there!

And when you does do lower flags,
Half mast our tails do fall,
As we does silent tail unwags,
Remembering them all.
You doesn’t hear the lonely cries,
The howls of those thats gone,
In the land where they all lies,
Dear animals of the Somme!

But forever we will heed the call,
Each year our tails will sink,
Remembering hoofs, paws and all,
And always pausing to think.
Respecting pals that’s still at war,
Whats sniffing out the bombs,
These are what today howls for,
And our cries forever go on!

We will remember them!








Thursday 6 November 2014

Wen You Dus Be Doing Sulks

Wen you dus be doing sulks,
You gots to make dem long!
Making shore de hooman folks
Dus noes deys in de rong!
Ders many ways dat you can sulk
And dat dus be de troof,
But a proper Border Terrier one
Is more dan just aloof!

You gots to do sum huffs and puffs
Making shore dey hear!
And if dat just dusent be enuffs,
You revs it up a gear!
Like wen dey dus do calls your name,
Pretend it is not yours,
Dat will make dem feel ashamed,
And gives dem sum wot fors!

You also need to turn away,
And curl up all alone,
No matter wot dose hoomans say,
It's dey who must atone!
If dey dus try de tempting you
Wiv kisses and wiv treats,
Member you must never do
Submitting or defeats.

Wen you dus be doing sulks,
You gots to makes dem long,
Making shore de hooman folks
Dus noes dey in de rong!
If dey dus cheat and be unfair
And come and cuddle you,
Den its time to do de stare,
And dat I finks will do!

Tuesday 4 November 2014

De Bestest Foods For A Terrier

De bestest foods for a Terrier
Not all de hoomans know.
First rool is more de merrier,
Secund, never do eats too slow!

De nommiest of all is dinner,
Speshully wiv gravy and meat,
By far it's de biggest winner
And weally goes down a treat.
But ders uvvers we finks is yum,
And sums we have to steal,
Like chocolate, cheese and minty gum,
Dey too makes a gorjus meal.
Den of corse ders grass and weeds,
And sumtimes socks and shoes,
But dey not de bestest feeds
Cos dey much harder to chew.

So de bestest fing you can get,
For dose speshull times alone,
Sumfing you'll never regret,
Is a Bronty-tyranny-sawrus bone! 





I Dus Luvs Sticky Weed

I dus luvs sticky weed,
It sticks to my snout.
It's de bestest tasting weed,
And I never spits it out!
Wen I dus go for walkies
And spots sum sticky weed,
I ignore de hooman talkies
And I do pulls upon my lead.
Cos oh I dus luvs sticky weed,
I luvs it more dan grass,
And wen I dus see sticky weed,
Dis delicacy can't be passed!

I dus luvs sticky weed!

My Naughty Spiteful Mean Little Cat

My naughty spiteful mean little cat,
Is naughty, spiteful and mean.
And when I does be telling him that,
He then does make a scene!
He wraps his legs around my head
And then he bites my ears.
He claws my tummy when I'm in bed,
And this does make my tears!

My naughty, spiteful mean little cat,
Is naughty, spiteful and mean!
But sometimes I daren't tell him that
Cos he thinks he's so supreme.
He opens his mouth around my snout
And I does just stand still.
I doesn’t dare to growly out,
Cos I think that cat could kill.

My naughty, spiteful mean little cat,
Is naughty, spiteful and mean!
But when he does not be like that,
He's the bestest cat I've seen!
When he does his purrs he is so good,
Not naughty, spiteful or rude,
And I does feel so much love,
And guilt, for eating all his food!

Monday 3 November 2014

Wabbitz!

Wandering across de meadow,
My luvely hooman and I.
She was watching birds
Flying in de sky.
I was niffing niffs
Wiv my niffer to de ground,
Wen suddenly I niffed it
And knew dey was around.

Wabbitz!

So I began to canter,
Den I did do running
And I shouted to dem wabbitz,
"Wabbitz, I is coming".
But my hooman pulled me back,
As silly hoomans do,
But having none of dat,
I shouted, "Wabbitz, I is coming to get you".

I will get you wabbitz!

I did more running and pulling
And den I did get free.
Dem wabbitz dus need culling
And dats de job for me!
My hooman ran behind,
Crying out my name,
She sed I'm not being kind
And I shud be ashamed! 

Pfft! Hoomans! 

So faster dan de speed of sound,
Wiv my hooman far away,
Der was wabbitz hopping all around
On dis der final day!
But den my hooman did appear,
Wiv a huff and wiv a puff,
And she sed, "Oi, get you here".
And grizzled, "Enuff, dats enuff".

But one day I will get dem wabbitz! 




Wot My Mummy Dog Told Me

Wen I was a pup there came that day
Wen my mummy dog sat me down.
She sed that soon I must go away,
And that she wud not be around.
Looking into my eyes
She did declare,
My own big day had come,
And I wud go in the world out there
To live with my new mum!

And wen that lady did walk in,
Straight way she fell on her knees.
She looked at me with a huge big grin,
And sed, "I'll take that little boy if you please?".

My mummy dog did wags her tail
And as she turned to me,
She sed, "Little pup you will not fail
If you take heed of hows to be.
Stay clean little pup and do your mess
Outside and not on the floor.
Cos you see little pup they dus get stress
And you don't want to cause anymore!

Be patient little pup, they do be slow,
So don't teach them too fast,
And remember little pup whenever they go
I promise they dus come back!
Play little pup but do play fair,
And never ever growl,
Speshully if they got little ones there
Cos they dus tend to howl.

Be brave little pup be brave and kind
And remember your place in the pack,
Having sed that little pup the hooman mind
Is very very easy to trap!
So love little pup with all your heart
Cos they will loves you back,
But try nots to chew the house apart
Cos they don't very much like that!

I loves you little pup but now you must go
So please just don't look back.
I likes the look of your hooman you know
And I finks you will keep her on track.
So goodbye little pup, put on your lead
And wears your collar with pride.
Live long little pup cos your hooman
Needs you forever and ever at her side!"








Sunday 2 November 2014

One Day We'll Be Togever Again

I don't no why her eyes dus leak,
I nuzzel her noze but she dusent speak.
So wiv respect, my tail low,
Off to my toy box I dus go.
Praps squeaky or bone will make her well
And wot ever is de matter 
She mite tell.
So I push chewy ted in her paw
Finking it's time for sum tug-o-war.
She wipes her eyes and wiv a smile
She says she'll play in a little while.
Den I see de photo wot made her sad,
And fink she's missing my bruvva
Wot we once had!
So wiv my eyes I dus explain
She must no more feel dis pain,
Cos in de Happy Hunting Ground,
One day, 
We'll all be togever again!





Def Bref

Dey says I carnt do kissing,
Cos I did eat sum fingy.
Dey says dat I got def bref
And is melling vewy mingy!

Dey turns away der faces,
I weally don't like dat.
Dey says dat I got def bref
From eating sum cow pat!

Dey says dat I need washing
Cos I niffed at de cat tray,
And now deys running dat baff
I don't want a kiss anyway!

Pidgins Is Weally Stoopid!

I'm a well travelled little chap,
Dat carnt be denied,
But everywhere I've ever beed,
De pidgins never flied!

I have such useful little legs
Dat walk and run and trot,
De pidgins have der fevvery wings
But don't use dem a lot!

In all de towns where I have walked
Ders pidgins everywhere!
And dey duz weally noying me,
And dis just isn't fair!

Aldoe I am a terrier,
My manners dey is gud.
But stoopid pidgins in my way,
I'd chase dem if I cud!

My mowf dus sumtimes open
As if to bitey chew,
But I just want dem pidgins
To shoo, pidgins shoo!

Pidgins shud stop being stoopid,
And be likes uvva birds,
Stop doing silly nodding walks,
Dey weally is absurd!

So wen I next dus walks in town,
I finks dat I just mite,
On seeing a stoopid pidgin
Gives it a little bite! 

Dus you fink pidgins are stoopid? 

Hoomans, Wots Wrong With You?

Christmas and Easter and Halloween,
Wot a sorrowful site ever to be seen,
They put us in hats, frocks and coats,
Really, wots wrong with these hooman folk?
And you fink that's bad then cameras come out,
Come on hoomans wots that all about?
Then they ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ and call us silly names,
Not finking that perhaps we is feeling ashamed!
We is Border Terriers, proud and strong
And dressing us like clowns is really wrong!
So this is wot you have got to do
Next time that hooman dus this to you:
Run little terrier run under the chair,
Then gives them that special Border Terrier stare!
That'll learn ‘em! 



Wen Der Duz Be Sqizzels On Your Land

Wen der duz be sqizzels on your land
You weally havs to take dis in hand.
Trotting and hopping and leaping about,
Yous got to get doze sqizzels out!
Your sponsibility iz ups to you,
But dis I will tells you wot to do!
You habs first to niff and niff so strong,
Don’t let dose hoomans says yous rong,
Pulls on dat lead, but mind your neck,
Keeps on pulling doe, wot de heck!
Nebba lose dat niff, ooh dat niff,
Nebba ebba be left finking ‘oh wot if’.
So always be sighting wiv niffer to de gwound,
Turn on def ears against de hoomans sound!
Member dey iz daft, dey got no snout.
Dey knows nuffin wot we iz about!
Keep up wiv dat niff, coz sumfings on your land,
Member little terrier, sqizzels is banned!
Wen yous got your sent its time to act
And wen sqizzel iz in site it iz a fact,
Yous got to pull and pull and run,
Keep pulling little terrier until it is dun!
If de hooman falls over dat is sad,
But member little terrier, sqizzels is bad!
So nows you iz free keeps up de pace,
Stop for a tiddle and penny de place.
Den rise up little terrier, pwowd and tall
Catch dem sqizzels one and all!
Den wen de sqizzel duz looks at you,
Oh, bover, I don’t weally no wot next to do!
Sowwy!

 





©BertTheBard

De Call Ov De Border Terrier ( In honour of Toby)

From over de hills and yonder dales,
We directs de wind wiv waggin tails.
For if one is lost, we is all alone,
Howling and yowling till our pal comes home!
And barking and yarking far and wide,
Miles apart, yet side by side!
We is not vicious, but we is tuff,
And wen a pal is missin you’ll hear us wuff!
We Border Terriers is a gentle breed
But if we is stolen, feeves take heed!
De power of de pen in are people’s paws,
We does make the BT laws!
We little but tenacious furs
And helped by our hims and hers,
We can read and we can wite,
Dats the telligent way we fite!
And wen uvvas is lost we answer de call,
Paw in paw, one and all!
We is never mean, we is not bossy,
But do beware, don’t ever upset de BT Posse!
©BertTheBard